Challenge #7, January 2012: WRITING AWAY

I will write for myself  for at least 30 minutes a day (on average) AND I will launch my blog about this project by the end of the month!

"Planning to write is not writing. Outlining…researching…talking to people about what you're doing, none of that is writing. Writing is writing." -E.L. Doctorow

Why

Tap Tap Tapping away right now, or rather write now – putting in the time and rediscovering my love for creating and expressing some of my numerous thoughts through writing, it has been way too long since I have done this regularly.  The process has only been sporadic in the past several years, either through occasional entries in a stream of consciousness journal, or a poem here or there, or a letter to a friend or family member.   I miss the regular weekly rhythm of having an assignment due for the creative writing classes I took over ten years ago – I still enjoy rereading some of the stories and pieces I came up with during that time.  My writing lately is mostly limited to work related pieces -grant writing or reporting, emailing, etc, which I do for a living now.

So this month’s challenge has dual purposes – arguably most importantly to get me off my procrastinating butt and get this darn blog that I have been whispering occasionally about for months (to a small and encouraging audience) AND to just get me back in the groove of writing in general.  I do really enjoy the process of creating and writing and editing, but it has been a challenge forcing my way past the block and drudging through the swamp-o-fear (what if no one reads it, what if anyone, someone reads it?  what if they don’t like it and comment on it, what if no one ever comments?  what if I put something up there with a typo or a grammatical error?  what if…dozens of other scenarios arise, and as you might imagine, it can be a frightening swamp indeed).  But what if I actually just keep tap tap tapping, then start up up uploading – well, here goes.

Now I'm at the end of month and here’s where we’re (yes, you are now with me in this, if you have read this far!) at: 

• I have been writing AN AVERAGE of 30+ minutes a day, but not 30 minutes EACH day, as I originally envisioned this month.  Some days I just don’t feel inspired or my brain isn’t fired (up) or I’m just tired.  Writing more days that not writing overall though, so that it is somewhat of a habit now.  I read somewhere where you shouldn’t go more than two days without exercising if you want to make it a habit – good advice for writers too I believe.

• Some days have been much easier than others – there is such a variety in my writing moods and attention spans, does this happen to other folks as well?  It must.

• The best things I wrote (at least what I felt best about writing) were 1) a poem that literally poured out of my heart so fast and furious that it was all I could do to gather all the gushing to assemble it on the page somewhat sensibly and 2) a letter to the editor of my local paper on an issue that I am oddly attached to – the new plastic bag ban in our fair city, had to support it in a meaningful way.

• The worst things I wrote were the ramblings in my non-inspired, non-motivated, non-writerly rants on how I am not really in the mood, don’t have anything to say, etc etc.  BUT actually even out of those came a few new ideas that I got down for future use, so yes it was worth it to stick to the full 30 minutes once I got going.

What I learned

Whew I have got a long way to go before attempting to become a Full Time Writer of any sort!  And is that what I want, I don’t really think so.  There are so many interests love to explore, but I just want to get better overall at expression through writing, which I know will be beneficial no matter what I am doing 5 years or 10 years or 25 years from now.  I just know I enjoy it and it is a craft that takes deep practice, focus, and incredible attention.  I appreciate all the novelists, journalists, and bloggers out there even more so after going through it on a much smaller scale this month.  I will keep up with it - after all I now have this blog to write, and maybe even a few readers (hopefully!) to be accountable to...

INTERMISSION

As of December 31, 2011 I am now 20% of the way into this project, so I wanted to pause and take a peak backwards.  Just five quick insights:

• Habits can become easier to stick with after 30 days, but for me some will take longer, and/or revisiting to become more permanent – the calorie counting and exercising for example. 
  I actually did a 5 day Power Challenge last week – combining no alcohol, 1500 calories a day, working out 30 minutes a day, AND my current challenge of writing for 30 minutes – keeping track of all this took more focus, but was quite manageable (and I lost those few pounds that had crept back on).

• I do feel like I am taking a more disciplined, organized approach to most aspects of my life now – and am consciously trying to optimize my actions and behaviors, and this makes me feel less stressed and happier overall.

• Speaking of happy, around New Years I read The Happiness Project, by Gretchen Rubin.  It is a very well organized and researched book, with different challenges and themes each month aimed at the study of creating more happiness in our daily lives.  I didn’t know the book or her blog existed when I started this project, but am now even further inspired for what I am doing here. 

• I have decided on my next 6 months of challenges, which I am truly excited about and look forward to undertaking with even more enthusiasm than the previous ones – I hope you’ll stay tuned, there are a few fun ones to come!

Challenge #6, December 2011: CLOSET CLEANSING

I will give away an article of clothing for every day of the month (a pair of socks or shoes only counts as one).

Just around the corner in every woman's mind - is a lovely dress, a wonderful suit, or entire costume which will make an enchanting new creature of her.  ~Wilhela Cushman

The Why, and a Bit of History

I used to work in the fashion biz.  In another lifetime, before I became envirogirl passionate about ocean conservation I wanted to work in the apparel industry, quite possibly forever, or so I thought.  A few years out of UCLA I switched gears from the sciences, worked at Nordstrom and went to FIDM and earned a degree in Fashion Merchandising.  I soon started at a major swimwear manufacturer as a fit model - not your typical way of jumping into the industry, but it worked thanks to my measurements at the time (over 20 years and 10 pounds ago).  For six years I helped make several popular brands of women’s swimwear fit better, look better, and sell better.  I worked my way up to the “Advertising and Public Relations Manager”. It was all so exciting for quite a while, and leading a team of professional models, photographers, graphic designers, printers, and everyone else, in order to produce catalogs and ads was personally rewarding and fulfilling, for a while. During this time, I pretty much lived and breathed this business – I read every women’s fashion magazine and knew every trend, and I cared about my own wardrobe.  I owned countless swimsuits and a fairly extensive wardrobe of clothes to go out dancing and clubbing in, did a lot of that in my late twenties…Alas yes, a few pairs of M.C. Hammer-pants were featured prominently in my wardrobe, I wore the black ones much more often than the purple ones though.

Since then and especially in the past few years, I just don’t really care very much about clothes – as long as they look decent, are totally comfortable, match, and are not Hammer-pants out of date, I am generally okay with them.  I do enjoy a nice new piece every now and then, but I usually won’t buy anything unless I can see it fitting in with and enhancing what I already have, or if it will serve as a replacement for something I need to get rid of due to wear and tear, and often only if it is on sale as well. But I noticed recently that I was keeping too many things in my closet that I am not wearing regularly, and really don’t see myself needing or wearing anytime soon – sound familiar?

So this was actually a pretty easy month – I actually parted with more than 31 (35) items, most without any hesitation, like the 3 pairs of white socks and 4 pairs of pantyhose I never wear anymore.  And the knit top that had all the buttons down front curving slightly to the right that I always felt self-conscious wearing  - what if somebody notices!  The two t-shirts from a triathlon and a 10K run I did a few years ago, races that I enjoyed the memory of doing them when I looked at the shirts, but were uncomfortable – over it!  And the long sleeve one from September’s swim race in La Jolla that was NEON LIME GREEN – soooooo not my color!  This was fun and definitely  cleansing, and at the end of the month my t-shirt drawer was finally not overflowing anymore - nice!  One of the most memorable giveaways was the raisin colored corduroy pants - they just didn’t fit well anymore (too baggy after the recent droppage of 6 pounds) and I was definitely okay with that.  I didn’t have a whole lot of tops to go with them anyway. 

I also realized I don’t have much of a cold (anything below 40F) weather wardrobe, and I am actually just fine with this, most of my travels are to warm tropical locales anyway.  But by borrowing from a friend and my mom, I was able to outfit myself just fine for the first weekend of the year in Deer Valley in the snow.  Borrowing clothing is a good thing for exactly these kinds of situations – why own something you will only wear once or twice a year anyway?

The Best Item I Gave Away

We went up to Nor Cal for a few days before Christmas.  I wasn’t planning on giving away (nor acquiring) any apparel during this time, however…we visited a lovely second-hand store and I fell in love with a deliciously soft cream colored cashmere sweater and a pair of deliciously soft and fuzzy pink UGG slippers, both barely used and my size – and both ended up being a surprise Christmas gift from my boyfriend on the spot.  When we returned to my boyfriend’s parents home, his mom tried the slippers on (we wear the same size) and remarked how good and stable they felt on her previously injured heel.  She delighted in them and mentioned that she also wanted a pair.  For the next day and a half she was determined – doing her research online and at the local shoe shop, but they were 3x what my boyfriend had paid for them, yikes.   I really liked them while wearing them around their house, but it soon became quite obvious to me that the universe had other plans.  So I wrapped them up and gave them to her for Christmas, for which she was very grateful, and I got to enjoy her reaction.  I am happy to report that my perfectly acceptable utility grey kinda fuzzy slippers (recently washed) are still in service as I write this, and they have no idea of how close they were to being replaced – I’m not telling them.  All is well in the slipper universe, and I got to count this as my favorite clothing giveaway of the month!

Net Clothing Flow and Take Aways

-35 that I purged, but +4;  the cashmere sweater, a T –shirt from running a 5K race on Christmas, a very cute mermaid t-shirt (gift from my sister), and a new very cute and very practical grey jacket I bought, for a total of -31, so I am okay with this!  Taking the bags of clothing I discarded to the Goodwill store was very cleansing, and I feel like I am really committed to keep the net wardrobe flow down to zero, or negative is okay too – keeping extra stuff I don’t wear or need is not my style.   Easiest challenge yet – on to something more difficult for the New Year!